Here are 4 practical tips that will help you create the marriage you want:
#1. Lower your expectations: In your little casa on the hill, you are quickly coming to realize that she is not the wife you had hoped for. He’s not the husband you always dreamed of. Every day there are hundreds of things he or she does that you never expected – and most of those things annoy you, frustrate you, or hurt your feelings. All of a sudden everything that your spouse does is wrong (or perhaps just different than the way you would do it), and it seems to give you reason to constantly be angry, critical, and/or frustrated!
Your husband or wife isn’t who you thought they were.
Or, are your expectations simply too high?
A wise elderly woman was asked the secret to her long and happy marriage. Her response?
“I lowered my expectations.” (Marjorie Pay Hinckley)
Do it. Just lower your expectations. That simple act will reduce conflict and contention in your marriage, and will change the way you view that dashing husband or beautiful wife of yours. To put it simply…
Take a good look in the mirror
Don’t sweat the small stuff
Don’t expect perfection from your spouse
“Don’t try to make him into what you want him to be. You fell in love with what he is. He will still grow. But you’ll learn from experience to trust what he does rather than jumping to negative conclusions when you don’t understand something”
Instead of trying to change your husband or wife to fit your expectations, choose to love and celebrate the differences that make both of you unique and wonderful. Embrace imperfection and realize that change and progress are possible, which is pretty good news.
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